I Am Not My Own
by Shatteredsand
Summary: If things were different, Beck might have fallen in love with Tori Vega. But they're not and he doesn't wish for even a second that they were. Because he's Jade's. Completely.


**AN: There was a really good Bade video on Youtube using Meteor Shower by Owl City, which inspired this little one-shot.**

**Summary: If things were different, Beck might have fallen in love with Tori Vega. But they're not, and he doesn't wish for even a second that they were. Because he's Jade's. Completely. **

**Warnings: Language, mentions of implied underaged sex**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Victorious**

**I Am Not My Own**

It's Movie Marathon Madness Monday. It's the summer and I have my own place, so what the hell, why not invite a group of my friends to hang out every week for all the cheesy cinematic effects Hollywood has to offer? It sounded like a very good plan in my head. It's even a pretty decent one in practice.

Except I forgot something kinda really important. Tori and Jade in enclosed spaces for any real length of time _always _ends badly.

Tori looks at me. Hard and longing. I know that look, and it's dangerous. She's going to get herself hurt, crushing on me like this. She's going to break her own heart if she doesn't let it go. She catches me catching her and blushes. Bites her lips and looks away.

Good.

Don't get me wrong. I like Tori. A lot. She's nice. Sweet, even. But I don't like her the way her eyes tell me she likes me. I don't _want _her.

Of course, she might think that I do. And that's really my own fault. I _had _kissed her after all. A stage kiss. An acting kiss. An I'm-an-alien-not-a-Beck kiss. A hundred and thirty-three percent _fake _kiss. But a kiss nonetheless.

One could see how she might construe that as me liking her as more than just a friend. But I don't.

If things were different, I think I could have loved Tori Vega. She's beautiful. Caramel hair and mocha skin. Chocolate eyes that melt when she's sad. But more than just her looks, she's one of the few honestly good people I know. She makes mistakes, who the hell doesn't?, but she almost never does something with the set purpose of hurting someone else.

That previously mentioned kiss? Yeah, it falls heavily into the "almost" part of that last thought.

But, yeah, if things were different, I probably would have fallen in love with her the moment she crashed into me and made me spill my coffee on myself. And I would have been hopelessly caught when she panicked a little and tried to clean it up with her sleeve. And we would have been lovers instead of friends.

If things were different.

But they're not. And I don't wish for even a second that they were.

Jade kisses me. Long and hard and deep. There's the familiar taste of possession on her tongue and I smile against her lips. She must have seen Tori looking. For someone so completely independent, Jade is so insecure. So sure that she's going to lose me. So afraid that one day I'll wake up and decide that I don't love her anymore. As if I didn't need her just to breathe. As my world doesn't stop spinning when she's not in it. As if I could ever _not _love her.

I kiss her back. Just as hard. Hell, harder. _I'm not going anywhere_, I say without words.

She's smiling when she pulls back from me. A real one, just one of the happy-Jade smile that are so rare. She only smiles when it's just the two of us. It vanishes in an instant, a smug smirk in its place as though it had never been there at all. I grin, big and wide, and whisper "I saw that." in her ear and press a gentle kiss to her temple. She can't hide from me, no matter how hard she tries.

She growls in denial. And kisses me again.

It's demanding and bordering just this side of painful, her lips moving almost harshly against mine. She nips my bottom just hard enough to really, _really _hurt. She breaks the kiss before I can turn it around on her though. Damn. I'm paying her back for that business with the biting. She knows she can't just wind me up like that and then _stop_. She's such a freaking _tease_...

Andre coughs awkwardly. Oh yeah, the gang's all here too. Oops. Something wet and warm slithers down my chin. I put a hand to my lips. My fingers come away crimson. Oh, it is _so _on. Jade raises her eyebrow at the look I'm giving her. It's a cross between_ I'm going to fuck you so hard tonight that you literally can't move tomorrow_ and_ really, in front of everybody?_.

She drags her tongue over the stream of blood and smirks. I'm ten seconds away from kicking everyone out the RV, movie night be damned, and/or just saying to hell with it all and having my way with Jade right here right now in front of everyone. Jade, however, just settles back into place against my side, content to have branded me with her touch. I groan, because, _seriously_? She's trying to kill me.

"Love you." She whispers against my collarbone so quietly that I feel the words instead of hearing them as she rests her head into the crook of my shoulder. And just like that, she's gone from crazy and possessive and teasing to soft and sweet and so damn cute that I can hardly breathe.

"I love you too. So much." I look down at her and all I want is to hold her in my arms for the rest of my life.

And, yeah, if things were different, I might have loved Tori Vega. If things were horribly different, and I had never met Jadelyn August West.

But I am not my own.

I'm Jade's.

Utterly and completely _hers_.


End file.
